http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnsngTNeGTg Hockey Defined Methinks it’s time to inject a littl

Hockey Defined

Methinks it’s time to inject a little levity into the proceedings before we get all playoff serious.  So here’s a little list of new age hockey lingo; complete with illuminating examples. These are a few of the more colourful and current words and phrases of today’s game that have been uttered in and around the Boy’s and the Devil’s games.

Spin-o-Rama – A 360 degree spin with the puck used to avoid an oncoming checker, fool an unsuspecting/over-committed goaltender or simply add flair to an otherwise non-descript penalty shot (see video above).

BD (Bar Down) – A quick shot that strikes the top crossbar of the net and deflects directly down into the net.  A player who performs this feat is said to “go bar down”.

Sui (soo-eee) – A blind pass to a teammate which puts said player in a highly vulnerable (suicide-like) position and makes opposing body checkers salivate at the prospect of an unexpected hit.

One-Timer – A shot taken immediately off of an incoming pass.  One-timers are highly effective as they generally catch goalies off-guard, but also require good hand-eye coordination to ensure accuracy and speed. 

PK (Penalty Kill) – A situation whereby a team is shorthanded by one or two players because of penalties. Box and triangle systems are the norm to defend a zone in five-on-four or five-on-three situations, but in general, the key to any good PK is pure hustle.

PP (Power Play) – The more favourable alternative to the PK is the PP (Power Play). Having a one or two-man advantage is obviously a preferred status.  Good, disciplined teams are able to capitalize with PP goals.   The following, by an unnamed but not surprising NHL team, demonstrates how NOT to run a power play.

Top Shelf (Where Gramma Keeps the Peanut Butter) – A shot scored in either top corner of the net.  Knocking the goalie’s water bottle high into the air adds a dramatic exclamation point to top shelf goals.

Toe Drag or Dangle – A nifty evasive move whereby the puck is pulled back slightly with the toe (front end) of the blade of the hockey stick causing a defender to lunge forward awkwardly while the toe dragger or dangler skates by him. Mad danglers appear to have the puck glued to their sticks. Stick work like this takes a fair bit of practice.

The Can Opener – A devious defensive maneuver, which involves placing the stick between an opposing players legs and then twisting (not unlike a can opener) typically causing the player to fall to the ice.  You need to be sneaky quick to pull off this move, while avoiding detection by the ref.

Wrap Around – A goal scored quickly from behind the net before the goalie is able to get from one side to the other. The older and the bigger the players get, the tougher it is to pull off the wrap around.

Split the D – A burst of speed that enables an oncoming puck carrier to scoot between two defencemen and in on their goalie, which usually makes them look foolish. Finishing with by going bar down or top shelf is a preferred outcome.

The Flow or Hockey Hair – A wet and/or greasy slicked back long hairdo accentuated by the combination of post-game sweat and years of hockey helmet moulding.  If you look up The Flow in a dictionary you’ll find a picture of Jeremy “JR” Roenick.  Several on the Boy’s team have fashioned respectable flows. 

This list would not be complete without the following penalty explanations from a fan fave, Denis Lemieux, keeper of da goal for da Charlestown Chiefs of Slap Shot fame.  ”You do dat, you go to da box, you know.  Two minutes, by yourself, you know and…you feel shame, you know.  And then you go free.”

Feel free to comment with any of your favourites from the past or present.

#imahockeydad

Most times it’s the smallest things that have the biggest impact. The Boy’s team had a tourney

Most times it’s the smallest things that have the biggest impact. The Boy’s team had a tourney

Most times it’s the smallest things that have the biggest impact.

The Boy’s team had a tourney in Ottawa the year before last.  Our boys won their first two games and were doing quite well.  In the third game, they came up against a weak opponent and, with a semi-final berth secured, the coach decided to shuffle his players around for the third period. Defencemen were moved up to forward positions and forwards (including the Boy) were moved back to defence where they could get some experience and have some fun in a somewhat foreign role. The Boy, who is defensive minded, has played forward for the last several years, but was moved back to the blue line on this rare occasion.  This was also a year when all players began adding slap shots to their repertoire, invariably trying to mimic the booming blasts of NHL stars. But they all had a ways to go to reach Al MacInnis status (or even the much lesser known Bob MacInnis status, for that matter)  

As it turns out, this tournament also had an enterprising local businessman who would record and burn every game to DVD and then offer the same to proud parents for a “nominal” price. Our team took advantage of a special offer, whereby we would each get full recordings of all games for $20.  We would receive six DVDs in total as it turned out because the Boys made it to the Finals; so not a bad deal at all. Personally, the $20 I spent on the DVDs was simply justified by a roughly 10 second clip within a single game.

The particular game in question found several other fathers and I standing right next to the videographer who was dutifully capturing the sights and sounds on the ice below.

To paraphrase and somewhat colour commentate the 10 seconds of action provided herein, a puck sent around the boards by the other team in the offensive zone was intercepted by the Boy (top left corner of the video) who was pinching in from his new found defensive position.  Recognizing an opportunity to unleash a gargantuan blast from the point, the Boy loaded up and took a mighty swing……..  If you listen closely, you can hear several fathers and I bellowing out a resounding “Whoooaaas”, “OLEs!” and “Ha Ha Ha’s” as the Boy triumphantly misjudged the position of the puck or the length of his stick. In short, he flat out missed. Unfortunately, what you don’t see in the video is the Boy’s subsequent response to our emphatic “OLE!”, which is nothing short of classic.  At 13, the Boy had the presence of mind to give us a ceremonial middle-finger salute and I could see the grin on his face from across the ice. These are the images which shall forever be etched in my memory.  He immediately grasped the humour of the moment and played right along.

This seemingly simple snippet of time in an inconsequential game is the true definition of hockey for me and why I cherish watching my kids play. Had the Boy simply fired the puck into the corner or even put a decent shot on net, it wouldn’t have left the same idelible mark as that wondrous miscue and the honest reactions that followed. I should, however, point out that the “Whoas”, “OLEs” and “Ha Ha Ha’s” have come back to haunt me in spades as the Boy regularly looks and derisively comments on the rec hockey miscues of his 40+ Dad, which occur on a much more regular basis.

As I watch this clip again for the umpteenth time, I just wish I had more of this stuff on video.

#imahockeydad